ugh. the dark place again.

going to the dark place. again. i hate it here. i also hate herr's
popcorn. and everything trader joe's makes. and chocolate. oh, and
myself. i started a 30-lbs-in-10-weeks challenge. that was 9 weeks
ago, and my weight is exactly the same. i've gone up, i've gone down.
i'm back to the start.

i'm getting to my dark place again. i hate it there. i've been
thinking more and more about regret. i'm starting to regret doing this
and not g.b. had i chosen differently, i wouldn't still be here. in
the same clothes. almost a year later. i'm so depressed.

i haven't worked out in two weeks. i'm so tired. i'm so depressed. i
work hard and barely anything happens. i'm just really, really
depressed right now.